Lost

 I am struggling to deal with the recent events in Charleston, SC.  As I pray and look to my Savior for answers, He keeps putting these two scriptures on my heart.  ". . .Lean not on your own understanding" (Proverbs 3:5) and  "Vengeance is mine says the Lord" (Roman 12:19)

This Sunday was Father's day.  My father was not in my life.  We were estranged most of my life, he died July 4th 2013. This is probably where by issues with guys and relationships originates. Don't get me wrong, my Savior put some incredible men in my life: my Uncle, my step dad and my friend Alyssa's dad. I just didn't grow up as a Daddy's girl. My Heavenly father, has always been there for me. Never left me to feel abandoned and always shown me love. Happy Father's Day to my Heavenly Father.

I have been posting this as an outlet for my constant struggle with overeating.  I want God to work through me, and this to be for His glory.  I sometimes get off track and have to remind or bring myself back into focus.  My goal is to live a healthier lifestyle that will result in the lose of weight.  I have been going to the gym and putting in hard work. I will admit, I have worked harder at certain times over others.  The physical aspect of this healthier life style, I can say I am maintaining. The other aspect-nutrient intake, consumption, or eating (A.k.a my favorite past time) has quite a bit more significance over the physical aspect than I had originally believed.   It had crossed my mind that the amount of calories and consumption of nutrients is an intricate part of the weight loss process. This was confirmed for me by an article:

To Lose Weight, Eating Less Is Far More Important Than Exercising More

The article made sense to me and reiterated what I had thought.  In looking for the article days later, I found it through the response to the article-which was not what I would have expected.

Responding to Readers’ Questions on Weight Loss


Since, I am wanting to focus more on the nutrient consumption, I am going to introduce a new recipe I am going to try for this week's meal prep.  Now, I have to say how I obtain the recipe.  I tried the salad for lunch from the salad bar at "local" Grocery chain. I saw this guy heap some on his plate, and meandered over to take a closer look. Once I had tried it, I instantly fell in love.  It wasn't sweet like I was hoping it wouldn't  be.  It was savory and crunchy and a little tangy.  I liked it so much that later I thought to myself, I want to know how to make Kale and Brussels sprout salad.

 

It is filled with fiber from the Brussels sprouts and the kale; not to mention the slivers of almonds and bacon.  The bacon being the best Apple-wood smoked Peppered Turkey Bacon  from Trader Joe's.  Back to the recipe .  So I got the idea to  call the Grocery store that I tried the salad and ask the deli if they will give me the recipe.  After a bit of a run around, that I thought might actually lead to them giving me the recipe-I was informed they were not able to give out the recipe. I tried, so looked for other avenues to obtain said recipe.   I have found a recipe and making it tonight. Right now my apartment is permeated with the smell of Applewood smoked Peppered Turkey bacon. I'm in heaven.

Sometimes this world is too much. It's overwhelming and I fear I will be lost. I hear songs like Francesca Battistelli: It's Your Life 

. . . And I find myself again-or better said, I feel like my Savior Jesus has found me before I am lost. 

Beach Baptism 2015

So this weekend was my church's annual beach baptism.  I was unsure if I was going to go this year because I had already been baptized and my daughter was baptized at our 2014 beach baptism.  However, I am a beach junkie so I took this opportunity to go and support my friend's son being baptized.    Of course it was great and I had a lot of fun. My favorite part of our church's beach baptism is my church rents a pavilion and supplies charcoal so we can BBQ-this is my favorite summer activity (I like BBQ so much, you can catch me still manning the grill at the beginning of Fall).   This year I decided to go all out with kabobs.   I made four different kinds: chicken, shrimp wrapped in bacon , steak and potatoes and pesto shrimp:

That is James in the background who was baptized on Saturday. 

I am from S. Tampa, FL.  Tampa has a lot of "Island " influence,   The islands that have the most impact on the culture are  Cuba, Haiti, Puerto Rico and the Caribbean.  There is such an impact, my mom made sure I took Spanish as a second language starting in middle school. One of my favorite dishes from the islands is Island Pigeon peas (gungoh peas) and rice.  Most of the recipes call for parboiled, white or yellow rice.  I can say I know my way around the kitchen, so what I am going to do for my meal prep for this week is attempt to make the Island pigeon peas and rice, but with brown rice.   There is an ingredient that many Island peas and rice recipes call for called a Scotch bonnet pepper.  I wondered  why only one pepper was called for in every recipe I looked at; I have learned Scotch bonnet pepper  sounds like a nice sweet name for a pepper that will literally set you on fire.   Most Scotch Bonnets have a Scoville  units ("is the measurement of the pungency - spicy heat of chilli peppers or other spicy foods as reported in Scoville heat units", "a function of capsaicin concentration" ) of 100,000-350,000.  Just to have something to compare this to jalapenos have a rating of 2,500-8,000 on the Scoville scale.   Though, I have heard high capsaicin concentration are good for you and boost your metabolism-I dislike spicy foods. So, I will be attempting to make this favorite Island dish but replace the rice with brown rice and cut down on the heat.  

That reminds me, please keep my "Coach" in your prayers.  This Saturday 6.13.15, my coach is cycling 68 miles (Yes, 68 miles; that was not a typo) to help raise awareness and cycle out obesity.  You can support the cause by donating To www.gofundme.com/CyclingTeam .  This man is an inspiration and motivation to all, though I doubt he has an ounce of fat on his body-he still uses Christ  and sets a positive example to cultivate physical activity and healthy relationships with food.  Our prays are with you Coach-you got this. 

It is not unknown, I am not the best at relationships.  I have arrived at one of my least favorite parts of a relationship-"the break-up".  It is my least favorite because  I have gotten comfortable, and now it is going to have to change.   I am breaking up because this new relationship offers more.  This new relationship is available 24/7 (anytime), and I need that because  I need  more attention than the average lady.  This new relationship offers massages, do you know how hard it is for a girl to get a massage now a days.  I like all the extra pampering.  I would be offering or bringing the same thing to the table-but would be getting a lot more.  I am breaking up with my current gym of one year.  I think it is time for a change in scenery and this new gym has chair and hydro massage.   I would like to just give them the one month notice  and have a smooth transition to the new gym-but from what I have heard it is not going to be that easy.  I have heard in the past by other members that when they tried to break up-monthly fees were still being taken out months later and they had to ultimately have the bank stop payment.   So I am wondering if I should just go to my bank first and tell them to stop payment ahead of time and then give the 30 day cancellation.   This way if they do not stop withdrawing from my account, I have already told my bank to stop allowing withdraws.   I just hate having to put this much thought into a break up, or any thought at all.  I am a very loyal person, so this makes me feel like  I am high tailing it for something better.  I wouldn't see "Catch" anymore, but I have been going to this gym for a year now and have yet to say two words to the man or find out his name.   There are also circumstance circling around why he may not even be right for me.   I do not know if he is even a Christian or loves the Lord.  

I seen the sexiest thing this weekend at the beach.  You would think with all the chest bearing men there it would be a guy jogging in just his swim trunks on the beach or jet skiing.  No, neither of those.  It was a guy sitting in a beach chair, holding a baby.  Not sure if this is attractive to me because I didn't grow up with my father in my life or because I want to have more kids but wont do so unless it is with the right guy.  It could be either, it could be a bit of both.   One thing I do know, this does not seen to be going away-but seems to becoming more and more attractive to see .  I think I will resolve not to leave my house for father's day.  (Not really)

I have some relationship guidelines, or parameters that I an considering redefining.  For example, my standard deviation or dating range is + or - 5 years.  Now this is just a standard, it can change based on circumstance and situations.  Another is rebound time.  If I have been dating an individual for 2 years, I am going to look to spend some time getting to know me again. (I tend to be all in when dating)  I would not be looking to start a relationship again in 3 weeks. How long would I wait?  I would not be able to say.  I guess it would be when God put it on my heart that he was done fixing and mending my heart, and was ready for me to show or pour out the love he has poured into me.  Which brings me to what I will be doing next week while my coach is cycling 68 miles.  "Lift Service Out" is a community outreach where we help out others in the community.  I am actually excited about this, getting to pour out some of the love my Savior has poured into me.  I have have never had to paint, but I am looking forward to do it this upcoming weekend.  Who knows God's plans?  All I know is if this is in His plan, I am ready for the adventure. 

Happy  28th  Birthday   J. D.